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5
Hard Truths About Romantic Love, Relationship, and Determining
Astrological Compatibility
Uh
oh... I feel at least a couple of dreaded (but necessary) Jupiter
rising sermons coming on... sermons about romantic love, relationship,
and determining
astrological
compatibility!
I
- Who Are You?
Hard truth number one is that any astrologer performing a personal, face
to face, reading on your astrological compatibility with another person
knows that - when the rubber meets the road - much of “compatibility” is
based on:
• Who
in the heck are you?
• What unconscious life myth(s) (scripts) are you currently
living
out?
• How hard are you to get along with?
• What sort of life and/or soul lessons are you on
the planet to learn?
• What is it that you need in your life that's
causing you to repeatedly unconsciously draw in and attract certain types
of people?
All
of the above adds up to who you are
as an individual and not the other "magical" person... II
- Purpose of Relationship - Soul Growth
“The
paradox of relationship will always be that rather than solve
our problems it brings us new problems, new complexities. But
we also grow immensely from these problems… these complexities.
In short… the greatest gift of relationship proves
to be that as the result of encountering each other
we are obliged
to grow much larger than we had planned.” What Matters
Most: Living a More Considered Life, James Hollis, PhD
“Seldom
or never does a marriage develop into an individual relationship
smoothly and without crisis. There is no birth of consciousness
without pain.” C.G. Jung CW17:The Development of the
Personality:331
Yep… that’s
right… committed relationships are, in part, for the purpose
of bumping of heads, and for the building of “consciousness” and "soul"...
Not too romantic, eh? Well… not always…
It's
not much comfort in the short term, but regardless of how things
(do or don’t) work out in the end… our soul is enlarged
from the experience of relationship.
Just
so you don't get too bummed out, here's the (potential) good news:
"You
see, the whole thing in marriage [committed partnership]
is the relationship and yielding -- knowing the functions, knowing
that each is playing a role in an organism. One of
the things
I have realized - and people who have been married
[in committed relationship] a long time realize -- is that marriage
[committed
partnership] is not a love affair.
A
love affair has to do with immediate personal satisfaction.
But marriage [committed partnership] is an ordeal; it means
yielding, time and again. That's why it's a sacrament: you
give up your personal simplicity to participate in a relationship.
And when you're giving, you're not giving to the other person:
you're giving to the relationship. And if you realize that
you are in the relationship just as the other person is, then
it becomes life building, a life fostering and enriching experience,
not an impoverishment because you're giving to somebody else.
This
is the challenge of a marriage [committed partnership]. What
a beautiful thing is a life together as growing personalities,
each helping the other to flower, rather than just moving into
the standard archetype. It’s a wonderful thing when people
can make the decision to be something quite astonishing and
unexpected, rather than cookie-mold products." Short excerpt
from An Open Life: Joseph Campbell in Conversation with
Michael Toms
III
- Love is Risky Business
Hard Truth number three is that no astrologer on the planet
can provide you with a blank check guarantee of success.
Think about it for a second...
if I were somehow clever enough to be the one astrologer on the planet
that could provide a 100% (or even a 70-90%) guarantee regarding
the ultimate “success” of a relationship -
then I'd be charging the price of a medium sized country
for my readings and people would
be lining up in droves to pay the price.
In
astrology it's thought it was sometime during the European
Renaissance that romantic love affairs of the heart came to be primarily
associated with the astrological 5th house of gambling -
associated
with the excitement of the gamble, the risk, the pleasure,
and the youthful, playful awakening of new and young love…
Thus
astrology as a wisened teacher judiciously attempts to
instruct us that regardless of the many "safety nets" we
attempt to construct in order to "even up" the odds...
romantic love and attraction will always remain a gamble, an
emotional risk, and a leap of faith that we must choose to take
(or not) when entrusting our heart to another person.
After
all... that's part of the joy, part of the torture, and part
of the experience of the "thing called love."
IV
- Emotional Baggage – Damaged Goods
It's vitally important in every reading I perform to mention hard truth
number four - that there are more than a few folks out there so very
emotionally damaged (filled with anger and resentment) that they are
literally incapable of maintaining and/or sustaining a loving soul bond
relationship with you (or anyone else) that builds up and creates new
life rather than tears down and destroys.
There
are birth chart “markers” or “clues” of
potential major emotional issues and/or baggage that the other
person (or, for that matter, you) is dealing with in this lifetime. However
there is no way based simply on looking at the birth chart to
determine or predict how successfully they (or you) have dealt
with these issues in their (your) life.
My
condolences if you have hooked up with one of these severely
emotionally damaged individuals. It happens – and,
when it happens, it would seem that all the soul bond connections
in the world may not be able to overcome the damage and who
they
have become as an individual.
It’s
painful when this happens. Trust me, I know… been there,
done that…
V
- Honest Astrology doesn't claim to have all the answers
As
astrologer extraordinaire, Liz Greene has often been fond of pointing
out, there appears to be an unknown “X factor” at play
when it comes to matters of the heart.
"The
heart has its own reasons that the mind
cannot comprehend..."
Plato
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