When Good Love Goes Bad - Common Planetary Configurations

I should mention that if you're reading this after being freshly dumped, then what follows isn't going to be of much comfort in the short term.

No Guarantees In Romantic Love!
First off... before getting to the good news/bad news... no astrologer (currently among the living or the dead), even when using the most "advanced" techniques, can provide guarantees that a relationship between two people will last and be loving... I only wish we could give such guarantees...

If I could give guarantees, then I'd be charging the price of a small country for my compatibility readings and be rich beyond my wildest dreams!

That's not at all what you wanted to hear, is it? And I imagine that I shouldn’t have confessed this, as we astrologers are, after all, supposed to be privy to all of the many vast secrets and mysteries of the universe.

I can't begin to tell you how many readings I've performed, when after giving my very best and most inspired spiel about no guarantees and that romantic love is always by virtue of its intrinsic nature a 5th house risk and gamble of the heart, the client then goes on to ask: "But, Dr Z, will it work... will it last... is this finally 'the one?' " or "Dr Z, why didn't it work... why didn't it last... will they ever come back to me?"

On To The Good News/Bad News
The good news is that hidden within the emotional chaos, hurt, and anger you're feeling right now, there is an underlying meaning and purpose to all experiences in life. At the same time, the bad news is that there is an underlying meaning and purpose to all experiences in life.

Unfortunately - despite our hopes of finding "a little happiness" - archetypal psychologist, James Hillman, author of the best selling book, The Soul Code, aptly reminds us that the very last thing our soul seems to be intent on is happiness. Our soul is instead looking for a sense of wholeness and meaning.

What Do you Think This Is? A Holiday Inn?
Yep! There is an all too obvious "reality gap" - between hope and experience - that remains a hounding, howling opponent to our peaceful personal fantasies of "a little happiness."

"There are swamplands of the soul where nature, our nature, intends that we live a good part of the journey, and from whence many of the most meaningful moments of our lives will derive. It is in the swamplands where soul is fashioned and forged, where we encounter, not only, the gravitas of life - but its purpose, its dignity, and its deepest meaning." James Hollis, in Swamplands of the Soul

Nope... it's not at all what you wanted to hear... that soul (your soul) is most often fashioned and forged in the darkest and most desolate places... but it's what you need to hear...

"In all chaos there is a cosmos, in all disorder a secret order... we are caught and entangled in aimless experience... It is a moment of collapse... Only when all crutches and props are broken, and no cover from the rear offers even the slightest hope of security, does it become possible for us to experience an archetype that up till then had lain hidden... this is the archetype of meaning..." The Archetypes and The Collective Unconscious. Carl G. Jung CW 9 Part 1, p. 32

Apparently... when it comes to romantic love relationships... a good many of our souls appear to require more than our own fair share of fashioning and forging...

The Usual Suspects and Some of Their Basic Themes
If the relationship was significant in the development of soul, then the most typical planetary suspects involved are going to be Saturn, Uranus, Neptune, and Pluto.

Rule of Thumb: Most typically one (or more) of these planetary suspects is transiting (passing over) someone's Ascendant/Descendant or Midheaven/IC by conjunction, square, or quincunx.

Saturn - Limitations, restriction, or depression
Uranus - Surprise, shake up, or freedom
Neptune - Illusion, deception, or chaos
Pluto - Violation, betrayal, or power struggles

Note: These planetary themes should be viewed as only potent possibilities - and this rule of thumb is certainly not meant to be exhaustive in nature... at same time, if one has to resort to looking for a more obscure or esoteric planetary configuration - then it may be saying something about the nature and significance of the ended relationship.

More Good News/Bad News
The good news is that (as we've already seen) we encounter soul in the darkest, most difficult night.

The bad news is (just as there are no guarantees in romantic love...) there are no guarantees - when we encounter soul making moments - that we will emerge on the other side any wiser, more soulful, or more in touch with who we are.

When potentially encountering soul, we may refuse to look at and deal with our own darkness, choosing rather to conveniently demonize our ex-lovers... while refusing to take ownership over our choices, and refusing to take any responsibility for the part we played...

Like it or not... feel good or not... that ex-lover - who we allowed to touch us - has now become an integral part of our soul's fabric, journey, and destiny... they (perhaps unbeknownst to them or in spite of them) played a crucial role in the shaping of our soul, and because of the ultimately painful encounter we are forever transformed and changed...