Have you ever...?
Have you ever been involved in a conversation with someone and suddenly (seemingly out of nowhere) some very "emotionally charged" rude comment pops out of your mouth (that surprises even you)? You think to yourself, "Geez, I wonder what 'possessed' me to say that? That wasn't like me at all..."

What irrationally "possessed" you was probably one of those mysterious archetypes popping out from within the depths of "the unconscious."

The Snowman and The Wicked Witch (liberally adapted from the Iceman and the Medusa by Stephen Arroyo and Liz Greene): Who is there among us, who has been involved a passionate "love relationship," and has not yet experienced the archetypal battle, scenario (behavior) of the "Snowman and the Wicked Witch?"

Imagine yourself sitting together with your favorite romantic partner on the sofa. Both of you are generally content and happy campers without a care in the world. Then one of you (usually, but not always, the female) leans over to the other person and sweetly whispers, "Honey, we need to talk..."

Now... under just the right conditions, this innocent enough "feeling statement" activates the freezing cold irrational archetypal behavior of the "Snowman" in the second partner (usually, but not always, the male). So the Snowman, the second partner, immediately becomes irrationally defensive and then emotionally withdraws from this dreaded, all too scary, "feeling encounter." In this situation, the "Snowman" is now headed for the Exits at full speed ahead and makes the all too futile attempt to escape into the relative safety of his/her head (thinking).

The Dreaded Icy Glaze
So an irrational icy glaze comes over the Snowman's face...

Upon this sudden irrational withdrawal by the Snowman, the original partner's archetypal "Wicked Witch" is then automatically activated. The Wicked Witch then begins the brewing process of magically turning the escaping Snowman into a cold, lifeless, and dead stone...

The farther the irrational Snowman attempts to withdraw into the detached safety of the head - the more (in direct proportion) irrationally determined, spiteful, and angry the Wicked Witch becomes in the demand to talk about feelings.

In this archetypal situation - both of you (the Snowman and the Wicked Witch) are clueless about how's, why's and what's suddenly "gotten into the other person." And the two of you are now "caught up" in an endless, irrational, snowballing cycle... You did notice I used the word "irrational" several different times?

Don't forget! Just moments ago, both of you were basically content, happy campers and hanging out together on the sofa. Now it's suddenly become an irrational, archetypal World War III... Yep! The Snowman and the Wicked Witch have taken over the two of you and "possessed" you. [Throwing astrology into the mix for just a second, this archetypal scenario can be described and seen as the squared off battle between the fixed Zodiac signs of Aquarius (Snowman) and Scorpio (Wicked Witch).]

Armistice (Getting a Clue)
The idea and/or solution to this (arche)typical scenario of being clueless - (according to Jungian Depth Psychology) is to become "conscious" of it. i.e. to get a clue!...

Real Choice

In our day to day lives, we often "unconsciously" and compulsively get "caught up" in acting out various archetypal patterns of behavior (myths, scenarios) such as the Snowman and the Wicked Witch. "Getting a clue" is how we can start breaking free of our more compulsive (and potentially destructive) archetypal patterns of behavior.

"Getting a clue" is the key to making our daily choices and actions feel less "fated."

How? By the simple realization that we don't have to repeatedly get "caught up" in all those same old compulsive behaviors and "fated" mistakes. "Getting a clue" is what opens up real choice and freedom in our lives. Yeah... I know... much easier said than done...

Back To The Example
Getting back to the example (and perhaps being a wee bit stereotypical), we all know that it's most often the man who's cast in the role of the Snowman... and it's most often the woman who plays out the part as Wicked Witch... However in my life experience, I've occasionally managed to play both of the archetypal roles in the Snowman/Wicked Witch scenario. Yep, most often I've been the Snowman - but then at other times I've successfully tried out for and gotten the role of the Wicked Witch...

Similar variations to this same theme can be found in the books: